14 May 2012

Growing Pains

Today I will talk about emotional growing pains. They hurt. Plain and simple. Just like the bones in your legs hurt when you are growing taller, your heart hurts as you grow older. As you transition from childhood to adulthood, you have a billion questions to ask yourself. Sometimes not knowing the answers to those questions cause grief to your fist-sized heart.

No matter what your questions are, only you know the answers. Whether you are trying to figure out your career line, future goals, or if you are ready to settle down and start a family; only you can decide. You must look deep within your soul to find the answers. Filter out through all the life lessons you have already learned, and figure out who YOU are becoming to the world.

Change isn't always fun, but IT HAPPENS. We all grow up. We all mature. Sometimes hobbies stay the same, sometimes they change. Hop scotch might have been your favorite game as a child, but not so much anymore. That is okay. OR hop scotch may still be your all time favorite. That is okay too. 

This blog will be all over the place. I apologize for that. I am all over the place right now. I am trying to filter out my life lessons and figure out who I am. I have always had a fear of change, but growing up is supposed to be fun. Well, not fun per say, but not so frightening. So, why am I taking this so hard? I will tell you why. 

In 2004, I lost my oldest brother to a car accident. I am much better in the healing process now, but it still stings around this time of the year. He died the day before Independence Day. He was my first major lost. I know we all lose people, but I took it hard. As time went on, I started losing more people. Now, my biggest fear is being alone in life. Fear of abandonment. Also, fear of not becoming the person I long to be. The problem with that is I don't know who I want to be. I have all this great insight, but why can I not take my own advice? That I cannot answer. 

So, let us all who are afraid of change make a promise to ourselves. Lets dive in. Lets grow up. Let's make everyone we've lost and even the people we still have proud. Let's not be cry babies any longer. Let us GROW!

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